Quick catch up

I met a guy and I am not sure what I think about it. Trying to remind myself that I don't need to figure it out right now. I can just see how it plays out. I am not sure what he wants or what he is looking for and I guess I have to remember to focus on what I want. He will make his intentions clear soon enough- if I pay attention to what is there and what isn't and don't look for what I want to see or ignore what I don't want to see. Speculation isn't going to get me very far. I have to learn to be comfortable with ambiguity (how many years have I been singing that refrain?). Honestly, I don't even know if I like him or what I want from him. I need to figure out how to pursue a relationship normally- not vis a vis him per se but in general. And I need to stop thinking about him. I have a life, I am going to focus on that. I have an appointment with a trainer tomorrow and I have work to do and I need to go through all the transcripts of the film interviews. Additionally, Lilah may be in town and then I am going to spend the day with her- which would be awesome on a number of levels. And I have a date on Wednesday with someone else. So I should be busy enough to wait this out .
Hanging out with this guy made me realize that I think I really have become more comfortable with myself and more accepting of myself. But it also made me realize that I am not really that happy with my body and I like it better when I have a firmer body- two appointments set with trainer this week and trying to recommit to dieting- hopefully my conviction to set myself in shape will remain steadfast.