Reassessing

There is this couple in my parents' community that I sort viewed as a cautionary tale. They got married when they were "older" and I had heard that she said that she never would have married him when she was younger. She is a very driven woman and he is more relaxed, small business owner, Mr Mom type. I always thought of her as I felt like I was getting older. I thought how I didn't want to settle because I just wanted to get married. I didn't want to relinquish my dreams of what I wanted for myself- would I wait all this time for someone mediocre?
After my date with Jeremy i realized that while I wanted to see him again, he isn't anyone I would have given the time of day to a few years back. I see that it isn't because I am willing to settle it is because I am confident that he doesn't need to represent me, I can represent myself. Also, I see how I might not have known what I needed when I was younger, even though I thought I did. So I may end up with someone that I never would have married when I was younger but that isn't neccesarily a bad thing, it may not be borne of a desperation to be married and a willingness to settle but of a more stable sense of myself and a better knowledge of what makes a marriage work. (Incidentally that couple seems to be really happily married)