Notes jotted down in Stats on November 14th
I also do have stats notes but I am not going to post those (if you want to learn about repeated measures factorial ANOVAs let me know)
*Why is it that when I am in some sort of relationship with someone my doubts about them are very clear--I saw all the ways in which Arnie wasn't a good bet, I wasn't sure I even liked Bernard, I wasn't that sure of Carl-- and then once I think they have rejected me then all of a sudden they seem far more attractive than ever? Which isn't to say that I didn't like them at the time but only after it's over so I seem to forget my doubts and mis-remember our time together as something that I was sure about and something that was far more wonderful than it does (i.e. all the silences that punctuated my time with Arnie).
*Was seeing Carl on Sunday a mistake? Should I have rescheduled for Thursday? or Wednesday. It's not that it would have made a significant difference regarding my experience with him but I may have doen better on my 2 exams. - - Am I sabotaging myself? Why? Do I want to be in school? Do I want to be in a neuropsychology program- would I prefer straight clinical?
* Why does every negative interaction make me doubt myself and my choices? Why I am so influenced by other people's perceptions of me?
*Maybe I'm just tired today. I'll get a good night's sleep and swim and see how I feel in the morning.
*Am I doing too much or am I wasting too much time? Likely - the latter.
*I'm ready to be in a relationship. Why do I feel like there is something wrong with that?
*What a really horrible day.
* Yay? I went to class and actually paid attention- not sure if I got anything out of it but this is probably the better way.
* Tomorrow I should read journal articles that pertain to my lab work. I should also finish reading David Buss' The Evolution of Desire and read Jude CAssidy's attachment research.
* My sense of security is SO vulnerable.
* Maybe it's time to take a break from dating and focus on school and applications for the next 5-6 weeks and also on dieting and exercising until Will and Meg's wedding.
* I'm supposed to be impressing the profs and I'm not- I'm doing OK but I'm not shining in any way and I'm not shining in lab. So I'm not sure I'll even get into the PhD program here.
* I should have made the commitment to my life and been patient and rescheduled Carl- or I never should have scheduled him when I had exams, I should have waited until after exa.s. Would it have made the rejection less significant? Will I remember that for next time? I knew better on Sat night and got impatient and chose to ignore it on Sunday am.
*Why is it that when I am in some sort of relationship with someone my doubts about them are very clear--I saw all the ways in which Arnie wasn't a good bet, I wasn't sure I even liked Bernard, I wasn't that sure of Carl-- and then once I think they have rejected me then all of a sudden they seem far more attractive than ever? Which isn't to say that I didn't like them at the time but only after it's over so I seem to forget my doubts and mis-remember our time together as something that I was sure about and something that was far more wonderful than it does (i.e. all the silences that punctuated my time with Arnie).
*Was seeing Carl on Sunday a mistake? Should I have rescheduled for Thursday? or Wednesday. It's not that it would have made a significant difference regarding my experience with him but I may have doen better on my 2 exams. - - Am I sabotaging myself? Why? Do I want to be in school? Do I want to be in a neuropsychology program- would I prefer straight clinical?
* Why does every negative interaction make me doubt myself and my choices? Why I am so influenced by other people's perceptions of me?
*Maybe I'm just tired today. I'll get a good night's sleep and swim and see how I feel in the morning.
*Am I doing too much or am I wasting too much time? Likely - the latter.
*I'm ready to be in a relationship. Why do I feel like there is something wrong with that?
*What a really horrible day.
* Yay? I went to class and actually paid attention- not sure if I got anything out of it but this is probably the better way.
* Tomorrow I should read journal articles that pertain to my lab work. I should also finish reading David Buss' The Evolution of Desire and read Jude CAssidy's attachment research.
* My sense of security is SO vulnerable.
* Maybe it's time to take a break from dating and focus on school and applications for the next 5-6 weeks and also on dieting and exercising until Will and Meg's wedding.
* I'm supposed to be impressing the profs and I'm not- I'm doing OK but I'm not shining in any way and I'm not shining in lab. So I'm not sure I'll even get into the PhD program here.
* I should have made the commitment to my life and been patient and rescheduled Carl- or I never should have scheduled him when I had exams, I should have waited until after exa.s. Would it have made the rejection less significant? Will I remember that for next time? I knew better on Sat night and got impatient and chose to ignore it on Sunday am.
posted by Zoe at 8:19 PM
1 Comments:
I think that every person cares what other people think of them. People who say that they don't are just saying that to look like the don't care because they really do.
As for school, its not too late to find your niche.
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